- see girlfriend, fuck a lot
- be at home, masturbate alot
I’ve had this to do list read since the 4th day after leaving….its been almost 3 weeks in a house with little privacy and people up at all different hours.
my penis is not use to this kind treatment.
“you wanna see my breasts” i say seductively to my boyfriend. i unbutton my shirt to reveal two large, succulent cuts of meat. i am a chicken. why do i have a boyfriend. why am i wearing clothes
“Ah, Perry the platypus!”
“What an unexpected -“
“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”
“By societal convention!”
“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”
“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”
This show is fucking brilliant.
Do you know how fucking long it took me to get through the Ravenholm level of HL2 because I literally had to stop every 10 minutes out of anxiety